Henley Goes To School - The Program

Henley Goes To School was created to show people that anything is possible. Our children are our future. They are what’s possible. Our goal is for your children to be reading before they turn three. And we want to show you how you can do this in under an hour a day. We’re not crazy. It’s not magic.

In this post, we are going to share with you the beginning steps to eliminating the impossible and replacing it with what’s possible.

There are a few hard rules that are necessary if you and your children are going to succeed in this program. There are also exceptions to every rule. So, don’t stress. Relax. You’re about to go on an incredible journey.

The most important thing you can do with your child is read to them. I’m sure you have heard this one millions of times before, but it’s true. You can experience more in a day of reading than you ever might in your lifetime. Take your children through books you loved as children and books that your friends recommend. Read when your child wakes up, read during breakfast, read in the car (just kidding, but this is a great time to recite a short book from memory that you and your child both recognize), read while you’re potty training, read at the park, read in a fort, read at the airport, just read, read, read.

Do we sound ridiculous yet? You don’t have to read every single moment of the day, but if you start carrying a few books at all times, you’ll see how easy it is to start pulling them out. So, rule one: READ.

Some notes on reading: this is time for you to read out loud to your child. Don’t focus on words or sounds or having them follow your finger, just keep reading. It’s ok if you’re reading to your children while they are dancing, swinging upside down on the monkey bars, or even brushing their teeth. They don’t have to be looking at every word you read. They need to know that reading is important, and the more you read to them, the more they’ll understand.

This brings us to the next point - you have to set aside time for learning everyday. If you teach your children that reading is important by actually reading, you have to teach them that active learning is important by actually learning in an active way. Every day (remember, there are always exceptions) there should be time set aside to learn. Six months old is a great time to start focusing on reaching your hour of learning a day. This 60 minutes is flexible though. It doesn’t have to be in one huge chunk of time, and probably shouldn’t be right away. You would be surprised though, at how long a baby can pay attention to something. Or, maybe this doesn’t surprise you if you’ve ever watched a baby stare at a spinning fan, or the leaves on a tree that rustle. Can you tell we spent a lot of time being hot when Henley was a baby? We lived for fast fans and cool breezes. Either way, babies, toddlers, and older children alike, can pay attention.

How do we divide the time during the day then? The first thing you have to do is figure out what your constants already are. What can you count on everyday? Now, children are known for changing their habits and schedules as soon as you have figured out the last one or speak it out loud (never, ever say your child slept in, it will never happen again), but that’s okay. For this example, and for most of the examples here, we’re starting out with a six month old, but the same process can be applied to children of all ages.

Example schedule, 6 month old:

6:00 am: wake up

6:30 am: bottle

8:00 am: breakfast

9:00 am: nap

10:00 am: wake and bottle

11:30 am: lunch

12:30 pm: nap

1:30 pm: wake and bottle

3:00 pm nap

4:00 pm: wake

6:00 pm: dinner

7:00: bedtime

You’ll notice we left out just about every detail other than eating and sleeping. There’s not too much else you can count on with a baby. Also, don’t let a funky day stand in your way. Mommy and Me classes or a doctor’s appointment are all bound to happen. As regular as a schedule can be, so are regular interruptions. In our example day, there are at least 10 scheduled events, and they’re all prime to use as building blocks for your scheduled learning time. For us, as for most families we’ve worked with, we found that we were most often together at dinner, and we used this as our main block of time. When do you get to spend the most time as a family? Whenever that is, use that time frame as your main block.

The goal of the main block is to achieve 20 minutes of active learning. As in our example with reading, it does not have to be a learning-only time, it has to be a time where you’re all together in one place for 20 minutes. The next step is to divide up the remaining 40 minutes among your day. It is always easier to aim big (this will be a theme you will see a lot throughout this website) and then fill in smaller parts, than it is to have a million smaller moving pieces that all need attention. We prefer four 10-minute blocks. Just like with the 20 minutes, pick a time you’ve already scheduled for your day - breakfast, pre-nap, and post-nap. Until you’re ready to sit down with your child for a continuous 60 minutes, there is no better time of day. You know your child best; when are they happiest? When can you expect a meltdown? Choose these times wisely.

It is absolutely okay to split these remaining times into smaller blocks, but five minutes can slip through your fingers. A dog barks, your doorbell rings, and all of a sudden your five minutes is three, and you’re wondering if you three minutes is enough or if you need to add two minutes somewhere else during the day. Breathe. If five minutes is what you have, then use it. What we’re trying to get you to do here is schedule learning into your day, just as you’d schedule a meal or a nap, and later, we’ll teach you how to fill this time you’ve set aside. Remember, if you can teach your baby that learning is a regular part of their day, as regular as their expected afternoon nap, you’re well on your way.

Let’s get to some trickier rules. Take a deep breath. Here they come. . .

No screen time. None. Zero. No TV playing in the background, not one Disney movie, not one cartoon, not one YouTube video, not one app on your phone. Are you thinking, there’s no way we can do this? Trust us, you can! And we’re going to tell you why this is so important. The second you introduce this world to your child, nothing - NOTHING - can be better. You’ve literally shown them the best thing they can experience, and they are always going to choose this and they are always going to want more.

This will be the hardest thing you have to do, but it’s worth it. We’re here to help, and we’re even going to help you break the rules. Here are the best substitutes for screen time: books, blocks, paper and crayons, stickers, stamps, and toys (read more on this below and also, in a later post, we will talk about some of our favorite toys). Your child will learn to use these as entertainment when you are with them and, if age appropriate, as self-entertainment. It takes time, especially if you have previously had screen time, but stick with it.

Now, let’s say you’re desperate. You are about to get on a plane for five hours and the writing is on the wall - your child is going to miss a nap, be starving at some point, screaming at all points, and you are definitely going to lose your mind. Well, you have two (and a half) options: 1) Stick it out - NO screens - and things just might settle down after 10 minutes or two hours or it will just be miserable for you and the other passengers. You won’t know until you try; yay for unpredictability! 2) Turn on a video. You are just about to breakdown and cry because you absolutely cannot handle one more glaring look from that person across the aisle and you know just how to stop this madness . . . and that’s ok. Do it. Do not make yourself crazy. Do not feel bad that your baby is watching a cartoon. But, option 2.5) You try again without screens, and you have to teach your child that they can be all right without the phone or tablet, and even be happy without it - even if the situation is avoidable or makes you a little uncomfortable to start. I can be honest and flex a little more here, and confess that while we are strict about screen time at home, we do not limit what our child does when she is at a friend’s house. What you do at home is your prerogative, and we do not expect all of your child’s friends to abide by the same rules you do, or be judged for choosing differently.

In the same vein of tough rules, and also as an extension of our rule against screens, we recommend not using any electronic toys. There is not a toy out there that will teach your child to read or do math or to code, not at this age. Right now your goal isn’t to have your child overstimulated, pushing a button over and over to hear a computer say the corresponding word. Your goal is to show them that reading is important and that there are regular times during the day when they will be learning new information.

It’s a simple start. Before you know it, your child will be reading!

Key points:

• Read

• Divide up 60 minutes of learning throughout your day (we recommend one 20 minute session, and four 10 minute blocks)

• No screen time of any kind

• No electronic toys